Tuesday, November 3, 2009

On Change

"The only thing I fear more than change is no change. The business of being static makes me nuts." ~ Twyla Tharp

"The only constant in this life is change." ~ Francois de la Rochefoucauld

On their Facebook walls, a number of friends have been talking about change. Their comments talk of its potent nature and the excitment that change brings. Years ago when I was going through a divorce, I remember that I used to say, "I love change. I embrace change. I take change out for dinner." Yes. It was my best friend, change and I skipping through life together eager to see what was new 'round each corner. A tumultuous and challenging time, my life had been thrown up into the air and I was waiting to see where it would all land. I had to find work, a place to live and a new circle of friends. But I was courageous, tenacious and lucky and I landed on my feet. My life changed. It changed big. And I welcomed it. Not to say that I didn't mourn the loses, of which there were many. But at the same time, I embraced the change. Life was ripe with possibility.


It really is the only thing that you can count on. And Twyla has it right; a static life is to be feared. Life is meant to be dynamic.
One season makes way for another. Children grow up. We change jobs. Our bodies age. Wonderful people come into our lives. And wonderful people are lost. Beautiful things happen that change our lives in ways that we treasure. And traumatic events can forever change our lives in an instant.

I have experienced a lot of change of late. Change that I didn't chose. Change that I didn't want. Losses that hurt. I have been angry and sad about the changes. But I am beginning to accept them. After all, not accepting change is like arguing with reality and only yields suffering. Like it or not, things are different. I wasn't ready to accept all the things that were happening right way, that can be a tall order, especially when changes are sudden and traumatic. There is grieving to be done and that takes time. But now, as I begin to accept what is happening, I am feeling more at peace.

Sometimes the universe, our own personal universe, seems to re-order itself. The life you knew is thrown up in the air and you wait to see where it lands. And people will tell you, well intentioned people, that good will come out of it, you just wait. And you don't believe it. Believing it takes time, as it is a process to move from grief to acceptance. I have found that once I am able to accept the changes that are about me, changes that I have no control over, I am then able to feel not only a sense of peace but just the faintest glimmer of hope. Life is reordering itself. And I can see now that at some point life will feel ripe with possibility again.


One change that I didn't want and I didn't expect was a 3 month set back with a wrist injury that has interfered with my bodywork practice and dance teaching. I am happy to report that my wrist is finally starting to feel significantly better. So those of you who have been waiting to schedule a massage appointment, hesitate no longer. I hope to see you on the treatment table soon!

The picture, in case you were curious, is from the Twyla Tharp Foundation.

Wishing you balance,



  1. I shall be over for my massage as soon as I get my first paycheck. Having gainful employment again is a good change for me!


  2. Paula- Congratulations on a welcome change. Looking forward to the massage as well.

  3. Thanks for writing this, Nancy, and returning the inspiration! It did bring some tears, as this cat personally has once again been thrown into the air and is in the process of landing on her feet again...acceptance, time, belief, patience...

    I'm glad to hear your body has gotten back into balance!

    love & peace always...

  4. change is constant, but it also happens sometimes in such increments that i get really impatient waiting for it. but then i look back after 6 months or so and realize how much has changed. it's such a dynamic thing. i love it, even when it does throw me up in the air and make me wonder where i'm landing...great post!

  5. Nancy- Thanks for providing an inspiring quote. Another FB friend had initiated a conversation about change, starting with the other quote. It was an interesting conversation- mostly about how great change was. I felt compelled to add the perspective of it also being difficult sometimes.

    Julochka- It can be hard to see. That is why it can be really great to reflect every so often on a regular basis, so that you can take time to appreciate where you have landed. I suppose that we are in the process of landing all the time, huh?


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